Two Years of Standup
In May 2023, I decided to take a standup comedy class for women. I had no hope or agenda of becoming a star or anything. I really just wanted to challenge myself to produce a set, from start to finish.
Over the course of six weeks, I - and a handful of hilarious women - wrote and refined our very first comedy sets. Each week, we would present our set, and give each other feedback. It was a supportive and positive environment - something you wouldn’t necessarily associate with comedians.
In June 2023, I performed my very first set in front of a live audience. And I knew it wouldn’t be the last time I’d go up to the mic.
Two years later, I am performing standup on a regular basis. In May of this year, I had eleven performances. As of now, I have three months of shows booked. I’m in no way claiming to be an expert AT ALL. I still have so much to learn.
Here are some things I’ve learned so far.
Relationships Matter
Comics are not always known as warm and fuzzy people. That said, I have gone out of my way to build relationships with comics in my local scene. Instead of going to an open mic, performing, and leaving, I stay to hear my fellow comics. I get to know my fellow comics. Building relationships like this has led to new opportunities with show producers. I can’t tell you how many shows I’ve been on because someone vouched for me.
Your Reputation Matters
Piggybacking off of the relationships bit, you want show producers to hear nothing but good things about you. Sure, you want people to think you’re funny. But, you also want people to see you as reliable, consistent, and kind. Especially as a minority (being a brown woman - double minority), putting your best foot forward is a must.
Women Must Be the Model Minority
I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but women are a capital-M minority in comedy, especially standup. It’s easy, as a woman, to walk into an open mic and immediately feel like you don’t belong. It’s not uncommon for comics and/or audience members at a mic to take their smoke breaks right when you walk up to the mic.
Because being a woman in comedy is an uphill battle. Show lineups usually feature:
A straight, white guy. A good-looking dude.
A quirky straight, white guy.
A black or brown straight guy
An LGBTQ person AND/OR a woman
We’re all vying for one slot on a lineup. So, we gotta be perfect. We overthink, overprepare, and strive to overdeliver every time, even if it’s an open mic. And even if we are on our absolute A-Game…we’ll still get a comment on our videos, reminding us that “women aren’t funny.” I was actually told to my face by an audience member recently that he actually liked my set. “Normally, I don’t like women comics, but I actually liked your stuff,” he said.
Nice.
The Only Person You’re Competing With Is You
What makes standup comedy so unique to me is that someone can take your set, and say it verbatim— and it will sound totally different. Everyone has a unique way they tell a joke or a story. From the details we share to the way we deliver each sentence, no comic is the same. Every comic has their own style, their own look, their own perspective on the world.
In sports, you size up your opponents. They are competition. Comedy doesn’t feel that way. When I see my friends get booked on a show, I cheer them on. If I get booked on a show, I have comics in my DMs, congratulating me.
My friend Joy has a phrase that fits this viewpoint best: “A rising tide lifts all boats.” When one of us wins, we all win. If one of us gets booked on a huge show, it shows everyone that we - as a community - take comedy seriously.
I don’t need to be better than the comics around me. I just need to be better than I was last week.
You Don’t Have to Be Mean to Be Funny
The concept of punching up and punching down was something I grasped very early on. When I was a kid, I referred to punching down as “kidding meanly” and I referred to punching up as “kidding trickly.”
Everyone’s idea of comedy is subjective. No one has the same favorite comic. That said, some people really enjoy mean-spirited comics who “kid meanly.” Personally - that’s not my style. Despite the fact that I don’t “kid meanly,” I continue to get booked.
That’s proof that you don’t have to be a dick to get laughs.
At my very first open mic, a bro-dude comic told me that for the first four years of my standup career, I’m basically a high school freshman that doesn’t know anything.
But, what I do know is this: There is a market for everyone. Everyone has something to say. Sometimes, you bomb. Sometimes you kill. Writing jokes isn’t easy, but it’s not unlearnable. It’s a skill and a craft that you work at, like anything else.
And you’re not unteachable.
So this is your sign to just get up there.
